Regular readers are probably well aware of my strong feelings about Bo's writing ability. Franky, I think his blog posts at yallsports.com should be canonized and taught to as literature at the graduate level.
His latest, in which he compares Mississippi high school football teams to college football teams, is no exception. His pairing system is based on what can I only assume is the first thing that popped into his brain. This is something he loves to do on air. He'll take one thing and find it's "equal" in another completely unrelated category. Like, "Let's match up SEC West coaches with the four CEOs that I've heard of." Or, "We're gonna pair recruiting classes with types of liquor." FUCK YOU.
Truthfully, this one is really not as bad as some of his other efforts. Don't kid yourself, it's still shitty and pointless, just not AS shitty and pointless. But I can not let this one short sentence slide by unnoticed. Bo breaks out the heavy figurative language when discussing Meridian High (emphasis mine).
Meridian – Stronger than Garlic on Waffle House sirloin. This crew wins and at times dominates South 6A. Alabama Crimson Tide
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There's nothing particularly wrong with this sentence, but it's just so fucking stupid. This is absolutely a saying that Bo just made up. Is the garlic-crusted sirloin an option at Waffle House? I'm almost 100% sure that nothing on the Waffle House menu even comes with garlic.
Plus, when was the last time you think Bo was at a fucking Waffle House? And do you think a steak connoisseur like himself is going to order this sad 5 ounce sirloin when his refined palette is used to the bold flavors of Shapleys. Your comparisons to lesser cuts of beef are not understood in The Lifestyle.
Actually I'm surprised that there's only one food/drink metaphor in the whole piece. I expected something more like, "Their offense is as smooth as the Macallan 12 I had last night."
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