Nash Nunnery is the Worst

Obviously I started this blog to vent my hatred for Bo Bounds. But I don’t see a reason why it can’t extend to other local media members that make fools of themselves.

I am talking specifically about Nash Nunnery’s latest effort in the Mississippi Business Journal. The issue ranked and profiled the top five golf courses in Mississippi. Obviously, this is an issue that needs dissecting.

Nunnery wrote all the course profiles including an introductory piece that is the biggest piece of tripe I’ve ever read. You can view the whole piece by clicking the thumbnail on the right (or online if you have subscriber account).

Let’s take a look at this little more closely after the jump.

Many golf historians trace golf’s origins back to Scotland, where the game was called Pangancia and played in an open field with a bent stick and a ball filled with feathers. 

He may as well write, "Keep reading for other facts I learned from Wikipedia." And, I won’t recount the whole thing for you, but later in this same paragraph he refers to King James II as “Jimmy Deuce.” I know.

There is likely no better place in the world to conduct business than on the golf course
 

Um, what about your office? Maybe somewhere with access to a computer? People go to the golf course to get away from doing business. No one wants to hear about your shitty startup venture or the life insurance you're selling on their day off. Maybe golf is a great way get to know an associate, but no one is DOING BUSINESS on the course. 

Business executives around the world know that walking a beautiful track with Titanium driver in hand on a chamber of commerce, picture-perfect day is the optimum environment to close the big deal. 

Read that sentence again and try not to throw up. This reminds me of something I might write in 8th grade. Again, golf is a compliment to the business world not a substitute for it. No one is signing off on a “big deal” at the turn. It’s not as if a potential client is going to be duped by the weather or seduced by your titanium driver into buying your product. 

Like business golf is a numbers game. Sure, you play it for fun….

Nobody goes to work for fun or to fulfill some sort of competitive outlet. It’s a job. People work to make money so that they can pay for things golf. 

That leaves three out of four golfers shooting 90 or higher. Now, don’t you feel better?

Rest easy everyone, because 75% of golfers are terrible. Nash says golf is a numbers game just like business. Because you keep score in both, I guess. If only we knew how many people were bad at business, then I’d truly feel at ease. 

To sum up: golf is old, most people that play are terrible at it, and anyone trying to close a big deal should start hanging around golf courses. 

I do have one positive to note here. Nunnery managed to cram so much awfulness into only a few hundred words. That’s really a very efficient use of writing. Not a word wasted. I can’t believe someone got paid to write this meandering, pointless article that is more collection of facts than anything else.